Episodes

June 22, 2021

Ssstop It (Book 6, Chapter 17)

The Wilsons are returning to the Pensieve for another visit with baby psychopath Tom Riddle Jr.- and they're just in time for a triple homicide! Plus: caffeinated Kev, a frank discussion about she-who-must-not-be-named and the harm that "it's just her opinion" can cause, and Les Mis?  Support th…

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June 15, 2021

Wax Your Wand By The Fire (Book 6, Chapter 16)

It's Christmas at The Burrow and sh*t is TENSE. The Wilsons are here for all the drama and every sexual innuendo Celestina Warbeck throws their way. Plus, Amanda talks about Remus Lupin way more than is necessary, Kev is reminded (again, somehow) of Donnie Brasco, and a stirring rendition of an AC/…

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June 8, 2021

Master of Psychology, Part 2 (Book 6, Chapter 15)

It's time to wrap up our discussion of how awful Ron currently is as The Wilsons tackle Chapter 15, The Unbreakable Vow. Kev's already getting in the Hogwarts Christmas spirit, complete with Love, Actually quotes, hymn-singing, and not remembering what street that damn Miracle took place on. Plus a…

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June 1, 2021

Master of Psychology, Part 1 (Book 6, Chapter 14)

Since 50% of The Wilsons will be traveling this week, one jumbo episode becomes FFH's second-ever two-parter (hopefully with fewer tears than the last one). This week, Felix Felicis is in the hot seat and the tough questions are being asked: What highly suggestive phrase most definitely changed for…

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May 25, 2021

Where Ya Going Tonight, Frank? (Book 6, Chapter 13)

The Wilsons are diving back into The Pensieve to meet the creepy-AF child that is 11 year-old Tommy Riddle. Naturally, this means they're talking about everything from The Bad Seed to Lil Nas X. Plus, diagnosing Antisocial Personality Disorder, Patronus Moment tears, and foils vs. antagonists.  …

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May 18, 2021

Never Go Full James (Book 6, Chapter 12)

Harry's gonna do what Harry's gonna do, and in this case it's whatever the EFF he wants. While the Chosen One doles out spells with no knowledge of the possible consequences, The Wilsons are dissecting the seriously crazy fate of Katie Bell and laying down a new soundtrack for an HP reboot.  Sup…

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May 11, 2021

McLovin' (Book 6, Chapter 11)

Hermione's offering another morally dubious helping hand this week- albeit slightly more satisfying given the asshat on the receiving end. The Wilsons are talking Quidditch, adult immaturity, #freestanshunpike, Dawson's Creek?, and Kev's strangely strong feelings about raccoons.  Support the sho…

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May 4, 2021

You Sure Got A Purty Mouth (Book 6, Chapters 9-10)

We've reached the point of Book 6 where things start getting dark, abusive, and generally uncomfy. The Wilsons are talking Amortentia and the power of scent, a Slughorn/Frankenfurter mashup, the definition of happiness, Bob Ogden's Used Cars, and sympathy for Voldy? No wonder this is a long one. …

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April 27, 2021

Schrödinger's Chosen One (Book 6, Chapters 7-8)

The famous shot from 'Jaws' is known (among other things) as a "Dolly Zoom". Here's some more info about it! The mantra Amanda mentioned was "Om Mani Padme Hum". While the meaning of it is somewhat debated (it IS in Sanskrit ...

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April 20, 2021

I Mean, I'm The F*cking Chosen One (Book 6, Chapters 5-6)

It seems all Kev needed to conquer two chapters for the first time this season was some of Molly Weasley's onion soup. This week, we're talking The Burrow, French Girls, and getting goosed by a Probity Probe. Plus: the Charmin Baby rumor, ring composition, and a visit from Draco MalKev!

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April 13, 2021

Your Puppet Master Is Showing (Book 6, Chapter 4)

Dumbledore's rare form continues this week as he plays Slughorn (and Harry) like a fiddle. The Wilsons return to the subject of The Greatest Wizard of All Time's bathroom habits, Kev casts Slughorn with a very unlikely actor, and Sluggy's hometown is re-christened...Budlight Bubblebath.

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April 6, 2021

I'm Not A Fatalist, I'm A Farmer (Book 6, Chapter 3)

Another day, another Dumbledore FLEX chapter. This week, The Wilsons are celebrating his annihilation of The Dursleys and their incredibly bad manners as they dive into Chapter 3 of Half Blood Prince, 'Will and Won't'. Is Hogwarts just an orphanage for unwanted house elves? Why are both Amanda and …

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March 30, 2021

To Catch A Death Eater (Book 6, Chapter 2)

It's time for Spinner's End and fair warning there are a LOT of threesome jokes.  Does Kev believe a word Snape is saying to Bellatrix and Narcissa? And what did he get REALLY wrong about the Unbreakable Vow? Plus, Amanda and Kev talk roller skating songs, history in the Wizarding World, and Nichol…

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March 23, 2021

Government Secrets (Book 6, Chapter 1)

WE’RE BACK FOXIES! It’s time for Season 6, and Kev has set us a slow pace from the jump when he decided The Other Minister was so chock-full of conspiratorial goodness it deserved it’s own episode. We’re talking cover-ups, Billy Bob Thornton, our complete ineptitude with British government, and of …

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March 9, 2021

Episode of Requirement: Owl Post!

This week, The Wilsons are tackling some listener questions that didn't make it into Season 5. What are the rules about metamorphmagi? Where would Amanda and Kev go on wizarding vacation? How does having and not having ADHD i...

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March 2, 2021

Old Man Jessica: The Kevlawney Prophecy Round-Up of Book 5

We've wrapped up another book and you know what that means! It's time for another review of everything the great Seer Kevlawney got right, wrong, and in-between throughout Season 5. Join us as we revisit every Book 5 prophecy...

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Feb. 23, 2021

David YEETS (Order of the Phoenix: The Movie)

The Wilsons may have read the final words of Book 5, but that doesn’t mean they’re done with The Order of The Phoenix just yet. It’s time for another MOVIE EPISODE! And while Amanda and Kev have some big compliments to give, ...

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Feb. 15, 2021

Limbo (Conclusion of Book 5)

It's the final chapter of Order of the Phoenix and The Wilsons are reflecting on which war is beginning at this moment and why it's not the one you think, Harry is a ghost, weird centaur sex stuff, ice dancing, and the band ...

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Feb. 9, 2021

Yeah No: Part 2 (Book 5, Chapter 37)

The Wilsons are back to Mortal Kombat "FINISH HIM" your feelings with the second half of "The Lost Prophecy" and for good measure Amanda's accepting Dumbledore's apologies but keeping him the hook for a few things, Kev's got ...

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Feb. 2, 2021

Yeah No: Part 1 (Book 5, Chapter 37)

For the first time in FFH history, a single chapter requires two weeks to cover. There are just that many emotions. It's time for Kev (and Harry too we suppose) to learn the truth about The Lost Prophecy, and The Wilsons are ...

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Jan. 26, 2021

Dumbledore Has Entered The Chat (Book 5, Chapter 36)

It's time for the epic showdown between old Snakeface and the only one he ever feared and there's a lot to unpack. But before that, we gotta twist last week's knife just a little bit more by dissecting the gut-punch that is h...

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Jan. 19, 2021

The Godfather (Book 5, Chapters 34-35)

Guys, if you skip Beyond The Veil it doesn’t change the outcome. The Golden and Silver Trios have made it to the Department of Mysteries, where noses will be broken and tears will be shed. Join us as we talk baby-headed Death...

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Jan. 12, 2021

Clevah Girl (Book 5, Chapters, 32-33)

It's been a totally normal and completely uneventful week here in America, there's absolutely nothing to see here, definitely nothing causing anxiety and OH what a coincidence it's the same deal at ol' Hoggy Warty Hogwarts. J...

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Jan. 5, 2021

Giant Boy (Book 5, Chapters 30-31)

It's a new year, and The Wilsons are barreling through two chapters faster than Hagrid on his way to visit the 16-foot tall burden he's about to put on a couple of children. But beyond Grawp and the West Side Centaur Story, y...

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